devo drag


drawing restraint 14


jal and a sandwich




forbidden island at alameda


no gum you guys




imperial teen supernova


loch ness spinach

and now the zoo animals









sebastian "not really a zoo animal"

Oh man. Ok, back from San Fran, or I should say back from San Fran plus an extra sick day because my back was so locked up/ in pain that I could barely walk. I maybe should not have gone to the zoo on monday but who can say no to the zoo, especially a zoo with a meerkat disco?
Some things I learned while in SF:
-you can get half-drunk for free in alameda, and with a little finagling you can get full drunk.
-seagulls are basically assholes.
-drawing restraint seven is hilarious you guys. you just have to see it.
-I am not good with stairs and dollar slots.
-when a cabbie tells you that his credit card machine is working, it probably isn't.
-other stuff, I don't remember.
pictures to follow, yo.

Oh great, so my myspace account was deleted. I guess that was the next step, right? I don't even feel like messing with that shit today.*

Last night I watched "Out of Africa", the whole thing I mean and not just pieces. Is it just me or is robert redford difficult in every single movie? His characters, I mean. I like the clothes and that one part where they back up very slowly and then shoot the lions. I want a farm in africa during WWI.

I am trying to find a picture of this one amazing hat, but I can't.


My myspace account is still there and I found the picture of the hat. I have basically accomplished everything I have set out to accomplish today, and it is not even 11am.

FUCK YOU WEEK, TODAY I AM WINNING.

Albums I just bought from the 99 cent/ dollar 99 cent vinyl bins at Zias:

I can't find the lyrics to that Bubba Sparxx song "Claremont Lounge" anywhere. I really hope it includes a reference to someone stripping to "867-5309", which was probably the best thing I ever saw there.

It probably doesn't.

I think Carrot Top goes to my gym. I mean maybe not but how many people look like this:

yikes, i may have to switch gyms.

2003-2004
I just went through all the old fotolog archives and pulled out photos I thought were lost for always. Here are some of them, atlanta look out. There are like 800 of these.








at the manhattan in athens


a sexy memorial!


sebastian joins the grunge scene


punk kids should not have carpet


i think carrie may have taken this one


ok what the HELL am I wearing in this picture. I hope this was a joke.




me and ari and uzi

















sorry.

from the ever-ponderous mind of britney spears, via the stream-of-conciousness section of her website, via the onion av club:

i don't even know where to begin with this. just behold, y'allz.

Ok why the hell can't I get "Hardbodies" through netflix. Has that shit not been released on DVD yet? I mean COME ON.

HI I'M CYNTHIA MCKINNEY AND WATCH ME AS I EAT THIS PUPPY!

thanks to bobble over at lj for the heads up on this hilarious picture

I kind of miss Daniel V. No shaggy hair this season. I guess that guy that looks like the budget Jude Law will have to do.

I don't have cable so I have to watch the reruns on NBC, aka last night.

EDIT, VISUAL AIDE:



I wonder if I will get cyber bitch slapped again for hotlinking.

Mmmm, don't nothing sound better for lunch than a heapin' plate of john kerry's head in a casserole dish!

San Fran in two weeks. I am going to see imperial teen, the matthew barney mound of vaseline currently at sfmoma, and drink pimms cup and have brunch between the hours of 2:30 and five pm, both of which are illegal in vegas.

This weekend I saw Morningwood by accident; I think my theme these days is accidently seeing bands. I also went to the gym and worked out on the world's most ridiculous piece of workout equipment, "the treadclimber". It has two treadmills which they call treadles and at one point I swear to got the LED screen read TREADLES TO THE MAX, which is also the name of my new band.

Can someone knit me bert's sweater so that I may wear it all winter?

I just added the following movies to my netflix queueue:

Out of Africa, New York Minute, The Adventures of Pippi Longstocking, The Devil and Daniel Johnston (which has not actually been released yet). At the rate I am barrelling through my queue I should be watching those movies by next Christmas.
Tonight is the one year anniversary of this really dumb night at beauty bar called "rawkers". It's the sort of night where a lot of new order remixes get played back to back with a lot of joy division remixes. Which would be fine if it didn't attract leather-clad go go dancers and unattractive girls who wear plastic dresses. These are also the sort of people who tend to flail. A lot. But anyways there are about 100 bands playing tonight and we have free passes so I guess I am going.
Yesterday I woke up with a migraine so bad that I missed half the workday due to being asleep on the bathmat. Bathmats are awfully convenient because not only are they located directly next to the toilet but they are also located in the only room not plagued by sunshine weasling it's way through blinds. Three drinks at the art bar. The flaming lips in it's entirety. What's that visual effect caused by looking at too many stripes?

What I really want right now is one of those giant pina coladas from the street vendor outside the fitzgerald.

Some things I kind of like about Las Vegas, though they don't make up for the rest of the crap, a story with pictures:

The fact that everywhere you turn there is the opportunity to play tic-tac-toe with a live chicken:



Shit like this guy, the man of 1000 voices. Not that I would ever go see him but the fact that he is there is slighly comforting:



Bonnie Springs, which is a fake old western town. It's so bad it's good, plus iit feels like the middle of nowhere. I actually recommend this to no one:



Ridiculous theme bars, like red square (communism-themed):



And quarks (star trek theme):



The fact that the "scene" is not even a scene and therefore the djs in said scene play pretty much whatever they want. On the downside it's not always what I want. I don't have a picture for this, so The Killers are going to have to suffice.



The Flex sign, Flex!


I also like how there is a molester van parked directly behind it.


Creamed corn:


ps. the description on this picture is "ghetto office corn casserole".

ok now it's your turn to talk about your sh-city.

Hey why is the sky slightly red and hellish? Oh and why does it smell like something is on fire? Because it is!
It's Southern California! And the smoke is blowing right into Vegas!

I like when the forecast includes "smoke". They all say stay indoors but fuck that I am going to stand outside in the 108 degree weather. And smoke a cigarette.

My god the new Thom Yorke album is boring. And not in that good sleepy dreamy way. Because saying it would put me to sleep implies inherent usefulness and I don't think it even has that. It's like background music for people who get paid to stare at formica.
It may grow on me though because sometimes my first impressions are crap.

ps. yes i love radiohead, all of them together as a group it would seem.

"I am a musical elf"

It's smack in the middle of summer an therefore I am uploading my extra special summer mix tape for everyone to download and enjoy. Just click the link below!

Summer Jams Mix '06

Here is the tracklist, although I have no idea what order it will actually upload in:

Loudon Wainwright III- "The Swimming Song"
Frank Zappa- "Baby Snakes"
Big Boi- "I'm On It"
David Bowie- "Love You Til Tuesday"
The Beach Boys- "I Get Around"
Love- "Bummer in the Summer"
Don Henley- "The Boys of Summer"
The Raconteurs- "Yellow Sun"
The Isley Brothers- "Summer Breeze"
Captain Ahab- "I Can't Wait for Summer"
Animal Collective- "Sweet Road"
Marble Valley- "Sunset Sprinkler"
Belle and Sebastian- "Another Sunny Day"
Da Backwudz- "I Don't Like The Look Of It"
The Kinks- "Sunny Afternoon"
Tom Glazer- "Why Is It Hot In The Summer?"
Custom Kings- "Swimming in Darkness"
Steely Dan- "Deacon Blues"
Pavement- "Summer Babe"
Iron and Wine- "Teeth in the Grass"
Beck- "Sweet Sunshine"
Architecture in Helsinki- "Do the Whirlwind"

Here are the Black Lips with Pete Doherty.

How did they get so mildly famous? Is it all the pants-sing? This kind of makes weird sense, though.

Jill: what about a matthew barney xzibit
Jal: oh, there's one of those.
Jill: good
Jal: Matthew Barney is going to pimp your ride
Jill: sweet. my ride is going to be so meta.
Jal: he'll probably nail bjork to it or something
Jill: as long as when i honk the horn, she screams like a pterodactyl

I swear to god if I end up with some kind of weird ass plural car mtv is going to pay.


It turns out this is the first search for "matthew barney" I have conducted on google image search. I have, however, searched for matthew perry. I don't know why.

What the fuck las vegas, I wake up to a day off and thunderstorms? All I had planned today was sitting by the pool, or sitting in the pool and I wake up to thunderstorms, and people completely unable to drive in the least bit of rain, it's funny on the short drive back from my gym I saw two people pulled over with their emergency blinkers on and one wreck, it's even worse than Atlanta. Nobody here has the slightest clue as to how to drive in a downpour.
I probably should have gone out last night so I could justify laying around all day, but there were several problems with that plan- one being that I am still coughing uncontrollably at night and I need to rest and get over it, the other being that I don't even really like Black Heart Procession, where everyone was going, and whose music sound exactly as their name would suggest. Depressing. I am so tired of neo-shoegaze depressing music, I just want to dance you fuckers.
So what am I going to do today. I have already been to the gym and to Borders, the thrift stores are closed and they might even cancel the fireworks, whats the fourth without explosions in the sky. Or without beer. I should get some beer, anybody wanna come to Vegas and drink beer in the rain?
I am so stream of consciousness today I tell you what.

Ever since I found out I could embed youtube videos directly into my blog there is really no stopping me.



Here's another oldie but goodie.

Last night I went to see "The Devil Wears Prada". It was "ok". There was this one thing about Meryl Streep's hair that annoyed me, the part where it looked like it was attatched to her head like a barbie doll. I have a visual aide for this:

It's where the arrow points it out.

Anyways enough about that. I am waiting for my Dayquil to kick in. What are you guys up to?


This dog was meant for the skies!