WHERE THE HELL DID MY TEMPLATE GO? Somebody stole it. Giant squirrels. Giant squirrels stole it. Or some other variety of rodent. Either way it is very much gone.

This is what it says after asking a troubleshooting question to the folks at Blogger: "Your unexpected behavior has been submitted." I feel like I'm in trouble, and they're coming to get me.

How dissapointing that ebay bidding is closed on Saddam's banjo. Who knew he could folk it up?

Another note to consumers living in the ATL who might want to eat a sandwich. Do not eat at Fabiano's. Yes, it used to be good, but at some point it went seriously downhill. And if you absolutely must eat there steer clear of the "fresh" mozarella.

Funny...i just wrote a scathing expose (is that redundant?) concerning the hidden meaning behind the new google logo. It mysteriously dissappeared right after i tried to publish. Google is blogger's parent company. Seems fishy...

Relics of 1999:
iMacs in colors
A new VW bug to match our iMac
Pets.com
Pacifier from rave
Jobs

I wonder how many times I can spin in my cubicle chair before I become slightly nauseated....

8.

Note to all consumers who might be flying in the near future: round-trip flights from Atlanta to LaGuardia are cheaper on delta.com than on any "discount" fare site (travelocity, etc.). Please don't book yourself on my flight, though. I do not like you.

Just got the new White Stripes album. It is quite tasty. Here's what Rolling Stone has to say: check it

PayPal is annoying.

Destroy all humidity.

Or just destroy.

Somebody needs to buy me this.

In light of a recent viewing of a old (pre-ditty) Puff Daddy video, Madonna's rapping suddenly seems nothing less than stellar. My apologies to the material girl. Okay, this apology is really just a lame excuse to reiterate the fact that P. Ditty sucks ass. Tomorrow maybe I'll address some actual, heavy issues. Cheers.

This morning I saw the episode of "Saved By the Bell" where an oil company (from Texas, I'm assuming, judging by the lariat that the oil baron was wearing) tried to drill for oil on the Bayside campus. All this oil would have provided ths school with enough cash to build, among other things, both a men's and women's basketball court. Unfortunately the drillers must have been a bunch of blind monkeys because they had a major spill every other day. Because the class was doing a segment on Ecology all the main characters became upset because their new found wildlife friends (a salamander and a duck named Becky) were killed in Bayside oil disaster #2445.

This episode left me wondering:
Do they still have as many oil spills as they had in the early 90's? Are they just not getting as much hype? Is caring about the economy just not hip anymore? Is it all about SARS now? And what the hell is all this hoopla about oil in the Middle East if there's a plethora of black gold hidden underneath high school campuses in southern California?

I'm having trouble understanding the grey space directly to the right. It taunts me. Without mercy.

Top 3 Reasons to Get Attacked By A Bear:
3. You smell of sweet honey.
2. You smell of sweet pudge.
1. You are wearing a sign that reads "bear food."

Oh, if only I had time to read everything wes has to say. Buddy, is it a lot. Yeah. Madonna's new single is pretty much crap. And i was a Madonna fan back in the day. And by the day I mean the first grade years. I caught some of an interview with her on the tv the other night and she was saying something about wanting to make a difference or to take a stand or some other shite.

I guess by "a difference" she meant "bad music." The rapping is worse than Blondie.
In the words of Sontag:
(mental note: read sontag)

Lee says to not make it funny, to make it Fallon. I think those, along with "write it straight, then write it great," are words we can all live by.