Wednesday, May 31, 2006


Quarterfinals? Semifinals? Something like that.

Steely Dan


Earth Wind and Fire


Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I found my camera! Ok here are some pictures from sunday in the desert.

dead car on the side of the cliff

we found kevin's cave

desert trash free hatchet

here are some pictures of leslie:

and the view!

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Today I went into the desert, up a hill and into a cave. The whole time I was drinking sparks and was absolutely certain I was going to be thrown out of a seatbeltless jeep, or the jeep was going to roll over the cliffs because that's what jeeps do. They roll. The caves were filled with nothing but rock and spray paint left over from the 80's, if you are going to risk using a can of spray paint in an unventilated cave it seems that you would choose a better tag than the word "penis". It wasn't a remarkable cave, not the sort that occur naturally with all the stalagtites and conquistador backstories and whatnot, it was a mining shaft from back when they thought something actually existed in the vegas desert besides more desert. So we left the cave and found a ton of bullet-riddled trash. Not only is there a ton of rusting melted debris in certain areas of the desert, it all seems to have been caught in a hail of gunfire. The most interesting piece of trash (besides the rusting cars at the bottom of cliffs) was a plastic santa next to an axe. Oh and shit shit shit I lost my camera. Maybe for good.
I left the desert covered in a thin layer of dust, the whole time since my goal was to just get in the shower. Now I have done that and I guess all that's left is to end the day. It's a holiday weekend but I hate traveling when everyone else on earth travels. They tell you go get out of here for an extra day you must go sit next to a body of water. Suddenly everyone has this grand desire to be in transit but I just want to sit down and breathe, plus I despise an overbooked flight.

Oh that was weird, a Magnetic Fields song in a commerical. "I think I need a new heart" and it's a dog food commercial. I adore my industry. Some people say its destructive, I think it's absurd.
Am I really watching Desperate Housewives? No, not really. I am going to lay down now and wonder how long it will be before I am able to visit atlanta. Right now it's looking more and more like never. Terrible, terrible miles.

I despise an overbooked flight
I adore my industry

it's a brain tumor and it's causing me to use awful verbs! ps. I have a headache.

Friday, May 26, 2006

As predicted by the producers, I learned a lot in the LOST season finale. A lot about life. A lot about love. A lot about electromagnetism and four toes on a statue. Here is the most important thing I learned:

You scored as Charlie. You are Charlie! As an ex-rock star you are in a drug withdrawl but have a soft spot for pregnant Aussie women. You are way cute and always have something witty to say.























Which "Lost" character are you?
created with

Wednesday, May 24, 2006


Last night I had a dream where I was going to drive an orange and beige vespa to LA, I was going to drive it from Alabama to LA or more specifically from the brick and stone back porch of my childhood home where it was parked. In real life I am going to LA tomorrow, more specifically to Burbank but only for a day. It's cruel to go to California for one day and then back to work for one other day. I need more time I have so much to do. Thank god for such things as Livejournal.
Does the Lost finale start at 8 or 9pm? I know it's two hours long, but which two hours is what I want to know. Do I have time to catch a yoga class beforehand is the real question. Yesterday after work I went to yoga because I guess I am the kind of person who does such things these days, it was one of those old man teachers who had been doing yoga for a million years. I think I was the youngest person in the class, I think I inadvertently wandered into old people yoga even though the schedule indicated no such thing. Afterwards I watched the House finale which seemed like a really weird dream I had this one time about having a really weird dream. Don't you hate hearing about other people's dreams? Don't you hate entries and paragraphs and conversations that begin with "last night I had a dream when/where".
The gym and the television. That's it I guess.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Flying Biscuit Goes Corporate

hahahahahahahahahahahgod i don't really miss that place.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Hey yallz I got some new glasses. I know this is big news for most of you.

this is the last one before we go into semi finals you guys so make it count
make it count
make it make it




blah blah blah vote

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Pets in Uniform dot com.

One of my creative directors just got this rock-em-sock-em robots type pen in the mail and is going around saying "my pen can beat up regular pens".
"Hey, hey Jill. I bet my pen can beat up your pen."
"Even my sharpie?"
My car tags were only $150! I say tags because they inexplicably give you two so that your car is sandwiched by registration. I was at the DMV for three and a half hours. I sort of made friends with the dude sitting next to me. He was drawing the back of people's heads on a large manila envelope. He made a valid statement which was how do people get their friends to come with them to the DMV? They are either really good friends or really bored people. Or maybe it's the snack bar. Oh yeah there is a snack bar, which tells you something about the number of people in and out of the place. At one point I think the numbers were going backwards. Enough about that.
"Did you tell your friends about the snack bar?"
I then went home and made something similar to kaylyssa's recipie for vegetarian chicken salad which was really good especially on sociables crackers. Sociables pretty much make a dinner party. Have you seen all the different shapes?
Oh, what else. Part of me wants to see the Davinci Code but only because I want to know what all the fuss is about but don't want to read the book. I have a feeling this is one of those instances where you will hear no one say "oh but the book is better". And also Audrey Tatou (Amelie) is in it, who is just cute as all get out.
The Today Show heartily endorses The Davinci Code!
I will probably never see it.

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I am eating wasabi peas as a brunch. They are delicious. Today I have big plans to spend the afternoon at the DMV, at the gym and then tonight to watch Lost at it's normal time instead of on a laptop.


My sinuses are burnin. For you.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Ok I just ran across one of the best things I have run across all day, and that best thing is Richard Simmons singing a song called "Don't Tell Me". Luckily I have the downloadable mp3 posted right here:

Richard Simmons- Don't Tell Me


In other bear news, WE'RE ALL SCREWED.

Monday, May 15, 2006

You know those zoo stories where an unlikely friendship is forged between two different animal species and they look after each other for the rest of their lives?

Well, this is the exact opposite of one of those stories.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

seriously vegas it's only may.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Last night was Mickey Avalon and Jucifer at the Celebrity Room. Mickey Avalon (LA's forerunner in the burgeoning drunken-glam-rap scene) has a song called "Jane Fonda", the chorus goes one, two, three, four get your booty on the dance floor work it out, shake it little momma let me see you do the jane fonda, at one point erin turned to me and said "I bet his parents are so proud".
I have no idea why he was on the same bill as count-the-amps Jucifer. Nothing really has to make sense out here, especially when walking the two blocks from the Celebrity Room to Beauty Bar involves passing something called "Neonopolis" and having such (presumably) pick-up lines yelled at you like "that's my favorite color combination!" re: erin's clothing, red white and black.
Here are some things that I said at the Beauty Bar:
"The song you are looking for is Don Henley's 'Boys of Summer'"
"You should just ask to try on his coat and then run out the door wearing it because that would be hilarious."
"I'm sorry for falling on your records."
"Where's my shoe?"
The dj said it was ok because he had already fallen on his own records twice. He also said he would never buy a Hall and Oates record. Oh and it turned out we were dancing with one of the dudes in "Shiny Toy Guns". He looked like Carlos D. He kept posing. He found my shoe.

I didn't take any pictures but here are some visual aids:

Mickey Avalon

Shiny Toy Guns

Hall and Oates

Thursday, May 11, 2006

I have changed my aim/ichat name to "oceanpals", except without the quotation marks.


adjust accordingly

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Tuesday, May 09, 2006


Monday, May 08, 2006

"I don't see architecture coming out of you."

Well, I am completely out of ideas.

I tried going out Friday and Saturday night. Neither were successfull. I did run across this guy:

All of his songs were about prospecting. Or at least in my head they were. About a million bands played. Nothing was ever slated to end.
I logged treadmill time. Saturday I watched the derby while on a treadmill at the gym. I like sports that only last a minute, they adhere to my lacking attention span. The horse that I thought would win won. I mean, totally won. Did you see that horse? I knew it would win.
What else did I do this weekend. Nothing.

Friday, May 05, 2006

I think I need an elementary school lunch right now, a tuna melt on white bread, crinkly fries and chocolate milk in a box. The chocolate milk is key. I am in the middle of an eye fiasco, I went to the eye doctor and he said that there was probably some dead virus left over from my eye infection last year and my body keeps attacking it. That's why my eyes keep getting red/light sensitive. So I have to put in these steroid drops four times a day which means a lot of taking in and out of contact lenses. It makes my eyes tired. On the plus side I got some new glasses, they are mildly cat eye. Try not to mistake me for lisa loeb, in the future I mean.

I forgot to do a music-off last week so I will leave you with a mildly absurd version of the usual:




I don't know crap about either so have at it kids.

You're nothing like the pilot, nothing like the matador, you're nothing like the one I waited for, but I won't rub your nose into everything you haven't done because it's probably Spring.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
for you are the wind beneath my wings.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Hey my new blog other blog it has mp3s check it out: Camp Basement

Last night in the bathtub between chapters 12 and 14 of Nabakov's "Transparent Things" I decided that after finishing the book in my hands and also the complete works of Beckett that I would work more on something I was writing, goddamnit why can't I finish anything. I don't know how crappy authors find the motivation to finish their crappy books, money? Maybe they have plot outlines, I have anything but. Somebody write me a plot outline having to do with time/numbers and a rudimentary understanding of physics (at best) and I will send you an autographed something or other.
I think I am going to start an mp3 blog. I think I would be really ridiculously good at it, posting shit no one wants like "Hot Lunch Jam" or "Idiot Control Now". I need to think of a name. So my schedule is as follows:

The Bloc Party, The Go! Team, The Pictures.

I remember this guy as "bored dude on couch at masquerade post music midtown". A delight!

They kept a giant disembodied head on stage the entire time!

go team go

I wish I had captured the dancing a little better, including the rocker leap into a split at the end, but alas. I'm not that tall.