i hope this singlehandedly kills the macro phenomenon.

This is what it looks like outside our office right now:

Pretty? Kinda. Apocalypse weather? Freakishly so.

oh, and I forgot to mention my LATEST MOVIE CHARACTER CRUSH:

yeah, crack pipe and everything.

Blogger just forced me to switch to the new blogger, or else not sign in at all. I feel somewhat violated thanks to google. I guess you own half my web presence now, fucking media consolidation.

So I go out on Friday night (granted, until 7am) and spend the entire rest of the weekend recovering from said night, drinking gallons of gatorade and watching "The West Wing" on dvd. I think I might be getting old, why the hell does it take me so long to recover from drinking these days. Another thing I have stopped doing is taking pictures, both of myself and of others. Oh, here's something for you to watch:

Arcade Fire has opinions on things! So do sandwiches!

I have pretty much nothing to do today at work! Which works to your advantage, readers! Because in my time of boredom, I have thrown together SKATE JAMS 07, THE MIX CD. Because I have always wanted to dj at a skating rink. I think that would be the ultimate dj experience.

DOWNLOAD HERE

Here's a good order to play it in, although like all of my mix cds they usually download in whatever the hell order they want to:

1. Tigercity- Are You Sensation
2. Magazine 60- Don Quixote
3. Cut Chemist- What's the Altitude
4. Kid Creole and the Coconuts- Annie, I'm Not Your Daddy
5. Infadels- Love Like Semtex
6. Fujiya & Miyagi- Collarbone
7. Icicle Works- Whisper to a Scream (Birds Fly)
8. Hot Chip- Boy From School
9. Subtle- The Mercury Craze
10. Company B- Fascinated
11. Duran Duran- Electric Barbarella
12. Archie Bell and the Drells- Tighten Up
13. Whitest Boy Alive- Fireworks
14. Shout Out Out Out Out- Forever Indebted
15. Michael McDonald- Sweet Freedom
16. DJ Unk Feat. Andre 3000 & Jim Jones- Walk It Out
17. Hey Willpower- Hundredaire

Character ideas:

-Pseudo-goth couple you always see at Wal-Mart buying groceries.
-Guy whose Delorian doors only open halfway so he has to crawl out on his stomach.

Tattoo idea:




ps. i'm so tired i'm actually angry.

Last night I made cookies from scratch. Oatmeal cookies, it's my mom's recipe- the same one that I've been enjoying since forever. They kick ass, but that could be nostalgia speaking. Does anyone want a cookie? I apparently lack the ability to cut a recipe in half, simple math skillz, what can I say. I have a lot of cookies I guess is what I can say.
I'm drinking coffee at ten pm, trying not to fall asleep before going to the airport at midnight. I miss being able to stay awake late, I'm so old. I can go to sleep at ten pm, no problem. Twelve hours of sleep a night no problem. My system's permanently fucked, or maybe not. (I sometimes make up my own medicine.) I worked today, yesterday, saturday I woke up to go to work but couldn't because someone set the fire alarm off in the building. I don't mind working so much but I hate waking up early (see previous sentences), thus in my brain I have worked all weekend. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have tuesday, wednesday, thursday and friday to face down under all it's flourescent madness.
I need to go somewhere for the weekend, one of these weekends. I need to like you wouldn't believe.

i think it's barnaby's cousin

"All the casinos here have been taken over by the NBA. I couldn't even go to my usual sat night beauty bar throwdown because they were hosting an NBA EVENT."
"Thats right."
"Lil' Flip and the Houston Rockets, and also Mike Jones."
"Who?"
"Mike Jones."

Yesterday I tried to convince a coworker that popcorn stood for "popular corn".

I guess my alarm wasn't set correctly; I woke up in a panic at 9am unsure as to whether it was a weekend day or a schoolday, which is what I still call workdays. It killed my entire morning. I'm still a little dazed.
My weekend's going to consist of trauma center virtual surgery and maybe hanging out with some random seattle peeps, who are in town for the nba game. Everyone's in town for the nba game. Thanks celebrities. Living with you is like living in a living nightmare.
Speaking of which, did anyone else think that the last two minutes of grey's anatomy last night cheesily killed the entire episode? I know most of you are too cool for that show. I'm just saying, it has zombies now. Anorexic zombies.

Mmmhmm, Abe the Babe... maybe not babelike in the traditional sense (he was definitely tall and dark, if not classically "handsome") but a mind that was hotter than Georgia asphalt. You could ask him anything, and he would probably know the answer, which could be very convenient. Abe was pretty reserved -- not so great with the romantic stuff, and he'd probably run and hide if you ever said "listen, we need to have a talk". But his waters ran deep, possibly deeper than any other president. Maybe even than any other mortal. Ever. And we suspect that as long as you were gentle and non-judgmental with him, he'd totally open up to you. And when he did, and you saw the true contents of his heart, your mind would be BLOWN.

haha.

Tonight is Of Montreal at a ridiculously tiny venue. I hope I don't die. I hope I don't get cute-d to death. I hope someone yells out BLOOMIN ONION. Someone not me. Vegas, I'm counting on you to shout out bloomin onion.

there are a lot of nineteen-year-olds who have for some reason friended me on livejournal

I jog off hangovers, isn't that idiotic? (We never learn, or maybe we're too scared to learn.) There's a certain livejournal idiosyncratic tendency that actually makes me angry, it's when people write "i think it", such as "i think it strange that someone taught you to write like this". Who taught you to write like that? Are you pretending to be british? Are you pretending to wear a white parliamentary wig and denounce this and that in the name of teenage narcissism?

I can't decide what's more annoying, syntactic pretense or structuring an entry so it reads like bad poetry. We know how to read, we know to take a short breath when the sentence is over. You don't have to force it on everyone like you're a one-man high school literary magazine.

I'm grouchy because I jog off hangovers, isn't that idiotic?

Sentence of the day, from a netflix user reviewing the film version of "The Great Gatsby":

Like the protagonist in the story, this movie should be sent to the bottom of a swimming pool.

I turned on my wii tonight for the first time in five days, and half the population of charlotte north carolina landed in the mii plaza. I want everyone to have a dance party in that one part of wario, but I don't control the world.
Oh and I was going to make a dance remix of "tears in heaven" because that would be hilarious, but I think I inadvertantly trashed my "beats" files in the great hard drive cleanout of a few months ago. I'll see about getting them back, I need to make this mix now and dedicate it to the memory of anna nicole smith. It will be heartbreaking.
"I'll miss you...me."

Hey, guess what? It's not even close to the middle of the month yet! That means it's time to download my PRESIDENT'S DAY JAMFEST MIXX '07.

TRACKLISTING (not guaranteed to download in this order)

1. They Might Be Giants- Lincoln, Washington and that Jefferson Guy
2. Architecture in Helsinki- One Heavy February
3. Lee 'Scratch' Perry- Mr. President
4. Magnetic Fields- Washington D.C.
5. Robyn Hitchcock- Mr. Kennedy
6. Talking Heads- Don't Worry About the Government
7. James Brown- Funky President
8. Tenacious D- The Government Totally Sucks
9. Hope of the States- George Washington
10. Q and not U- End the Washington Monument (blinks) Goodnight
11. Parliament Funkadelic- One Nation Under a Groove
12. Radiohead- The National Anthem
13. Village Stompers- Washington Square
14. Johnny Cash- The Gettysburg Address


DOWNLOAD HERE

I'm listening to Beggar's Banquet on vinyl. I have so many records piled up, or rather leaned up side by side in a listening queue. It's creaking and snapping, my record player looks better than it sounds. But I suppose a dusty sound lends a certain something to certain music. It made Blonde on Blonde just that much more romantic, especially around hour three of "Sad Eyed Lady of the Lowlands".
I'm not looking forward to whatever the boys club has in store tonight, if we ever catch up with them, if we ever care to catch up with them. I never have fun on photo shoots, not even with the free food and drinks, not even in the luxury Palms suits. My body immediately goes into exasperated headache mode, I have no patience for the best shots. It's a good thing all I do is sit and maybe fetch coffee. I'm a writer. I write the words, some people have a hard time understanding that. I wish Miis were more like Sims. There's no drama to be had on the Mii Plaza.
Oh man, here's a winner from the world of who's trying to friend me on myspace:

About me:
I am 35 years old,but I look like I'm 22.I have 3 children that doesn't live with me.I like to play games(board games,dice,cards,video games.Watch movies,go out with friends or family or on a date with a female.I'm an active person,I'm a little guy but large where it counts.I'm about 5'9" tall,140 lbs.,brown hair,hazel eyes,3/4 indian.Single because I want to be.I would rather play sports than watch them.I like to party a little bit.Easy going,nice loveable kind of guy,sometimes funny.I love children.I have a nice tight butt.I am a pretty good cook,I like to eat(food & my lady friends).Anything else you want to know just ask.

oh my god, learn how to put a space after the period. AND THEN I THINK WE WILL HAVE A WINNER.

My itunes likes to play that New Order "World In Motion" song, remember the one they shat out for manchester united? Today: I am not singin' for englin'. Last night: I did a quick once-over on my tax return and realized I owe the federal government money. This weekend: I am on a frantic search for deductions, even if it means I have to fill out the dreaded long form. My life is fascinating these days, all television and taxes.
Is it possible that I was ever injured in a war? I could itemize the hell out of that.