n'est pas

Why on earth would anyone point out how talented/good looking they are?
Why can't I get peanut butter and marshmallow paste pre-mixed for easier fluffernutter access?
Why can't real life be more like "The Parent Trap?"

I could teach tap-dancing lessons if I had tap shoes. I can do the traveling time-step and everything. I am so talented.

Dammit!

But I need some tap shoes, really I do.